Overcoming jealousy: The 10 Dos and Don’ts
We’ve compiled a list of 10 Dos and Don’ts in order to help you overcome jealousy and let your relationship blossom harmoniously.
Overcoming jealousy: The Dos
DO recognize you have an issue
The first step to overcoming something irrational is, as always, to acknowledge that you have an issue. Awareness will enable you to accept that your jealousy is most likely unjustified and therefore easier to conquer. It is how you deal with your jealousy that dictates how the relationship will continue. Recognizing your irrationality towards normal situations will stand you in good stead to control your emotions.
DO actually trust them
Many people who are actually happy in their relationship still get really jealous. But ultimately you have to ask yourself if you trust them – have they ever given you any reason to doubt their faithfulness in the past? Most likely they haven’t and it’s all in your mind. Remember the saying ‘innocent until proven guilty’? Give them the benefit of the doubt and actually trust them – there are still plenty of good people out there who value monogamy.
DO keep yourself busy
The best way of dealing with irrational doubts is to keep yourself busy so that you don’t indulge your mind and let it run wild with jealous thoughts. While it’s easy to allow your mind to come up with ridiculous scenarios that you imagine your partner to be in, you’ll have more control over your thoughts if you surround yourself with people. Throwing yourself into projects or keeping your mind occupied by spending time with friends will help you with overcoming jealousy.
DO improve your self-esteem
When trying to overcome jealousy, it might be worth also taking a look at yourself and considering perhaps why you become green-eyed easily. Often it’s down to a lack of self-esteem. Most likely, you have no reason not to trust your partner and the jealousy is coming from you being treated badly in the past or feeling like you’re not worthy of them. Stop this! Your insecurities are not your partner’s fault and if you’re not careful you will scare them away. Have some faith in yourself – you’re great and your partner is lucky to be with you!
DO communicate properly with your partner
Jealousy often arises from miscommunication and misunderstandings. It’s best to clear this up instantly by ensuring your communication with your partner is solid. Obviously don’t behave like a crazy, jealous person with too many questions, but clarifying certain things to give you peace of mind is no bad thing. This is better than letting your mind run wild with irrational thoughts that could easily be reined in. DO this within reason though; if it’s irrational and likely to offend your partner, don’t ask them